There are pictures abound in FB about clever virtual school tricks and tips. This will not be one of those.
Since the crisis has begun I’ve been leaving for work at 5:30a and getting home well after 6:30p.
“School” has fallen heavily on the shoulders of my 17 year old. My 17 year old who has hours and hours of work herself.
Teachers have graciously stepped in to google time and face hangout…or whatever it’s called.
But we are already behind. How we can be 3 weeks behind on the 2nd week of homeschooling is beyond me. But here we are.
Tonight, I decided I would help get her caught up.
We got her computer on–as in powered up. Yeah. We sort of peaked there.
We have a chart that a special teacher made to help keep her on track. Bless her! Tonight I ran down MONDAYS assignments. I thought it would be a quick recap. The blank look she gave me told me all I needed to know.
“Did you do any of the work?” I asked. I’d settle for one completed assignment. One.
“Did you even TRY??” I asked when it was evident she hadn’t completed anything.
Her sister poked her head down thru the spindles on the stairs. “I told you it was a bad day,” she reminded me.
Did I mention my youngest has ADHD? Did I mention my youngest doesn’t do well with change? Did I mention that school—NORMAL SCHOOL–is a struggle for her? Did I mention her impulsivity? Her temper when she’s frustrated?
Face masks and memory game becauSe we both needed a stress reliever….that’s the next text I got today.
So we have a child who can’t focus, completely out of her routine and are asking her to self motivate and semi self teach at her own pace. Couple that with an academically competitive, self-starter taking advanced classes who is covered up in school work and stress. Add a dash of mom who’s working non-stop and offering little help. What could possibly go wrong????
Tonight I was determined to fix the absentee mom part of the equation.
10 minutes. That’s how long we lasted before one of us was cussing and one of us was crying. I am not telling you which of us were doing what.
After 10 attempts I found the video in mythology that she was supposed to watch. Mythology. My black and white thinker has to study mythology. Better yet she has to comprehend mythology. And yet I can barely navigate the tools to her her started in the video.
“Hey. She’s in Greece. That’s where YOU were supposed to go. Not me. Just you.” She’s bitter that we had a trip to Greece and Italy planned…without her…this summer. She doesn’t pass a chance to comment on it.
The video played. I breathed a sigh of relief.
“Why does she have snakes in her hair?” She asked me. It’s been 100 years since I studied mythology. I can’t remember.
“Shouldn’t the video explain that?” I hedged while I googled.
“It doesn’t.” She said matter of factly. What’s the point of the damn video? I asked myself. Luckily I didn’t say it out loud. She spun the computer around as if to show me the lack of answers.
“It also says 5 minutes and 18 seconds,” I challenged. She’s spent approximately 90 seconds listening.
She can’t figure out where to find the assignment but she can figure out how to fast forward through the assignment? One little fat finger and she’s missed the entire lesson. I used my own fat finger to drag the cursor right back to that start.
129 seconds in and she says,”…still don’t know why she has snakes”
Brrrppppp…I drag the cursor Right back.
201 seconds,”…whelp…still don’t know”
Back in I go to move the cursor right back to the start.
330 seconds. “I am never going to know why she has snakes!” She cries.
“BECAUSE YOU KEEP FAST FORWARDING TO THE END!” I yell.
Tears followed. Again–not admitting who was dissolved to tears. It may or may not have been the little one.
We move to the couch. I’ve spent 11.5 hours on my feet today. I can’t handle the kitchen table any longer.
We start the video over…AGAIN.
It last about 60 seconds before her attention gets pulled away by something important–the backspace button. You’d think she’d never seen it before.
Now we’ve discovered if you press and hold down one of the buttons it makes the computer skip and cut on and out….like that video is experiencing technical difficulties. Took her 3 seconds to figure that out and me about 10 minutes to figure out nothing was wrong.
It’s been an hour. AN HOUR and we aren’t finished with a single assignment. Not one. And she has 3 assignments in each class. I started with the easy class. No way in hell are we going to be able to tackle math!
Forget the assignment…we haven’t answered the single question if why medusa has snakes for hair.
And we can’t agree that Athena made Medusa that way because we are too busy arguing that Athena and Medusa aren’t pretty names so we should be calling them Angelina and Meddy.
River nymph, shape shifters, affairs, gods….we haven’t even gotten to the part where she asks me to explain those! She did manage to hrrrmmmpphh like and old school marm and say,”I don’t think THATS very appropriate!” When the narrator mentioned Zeus impregnating someone.
One assignment. We didn’t make it thru one assignment.
Because I am failing this homeschooling thing she is sure that fail the 4th grade.