A mid-week rant…’tis the season

Pardon me while I go OFF

when is it ever, with the exception of Halloween, EVER acceptable, polite or even normal to tell someone they look like Scooby-Doo.  Hint:  NEVER.  Got that comment today.

Does anyone else find the ‘santa’s watching you’ think a little creepy? We spend 11-months of our children’s lives telling them to avoid strangers, never ever take candy from someone they don’t know and to tell an adult when they feel stranger danger.  Let December come and we are telling those same kids:  sit on that fat man’s lap, oh-look-that nice chunky man gave you a candy cane or there is a bearded man watching ever move you make and soon he’s going to come into your house WHILE YOU SLEEP.   Sigh…I suppose I am the only person EVER to have this hang-up.

Christmas cards.  Oh the dilemma!  Use real pictures showing your rug-rats as they are…all precious and dirty and unruly hair with mis-matched shoes or spit-shine them up, put them in matching sweaters, demand they SMILE only to risk having it show up on the bad-walmart-christmas-card-e-mails that surface every year?

Making a list and checking it twice? What about making a list, losing that one, making another only to realize it can’t be seen by EVERYONE so you hide that one and do another.  Lose that list.  Do a fourth.  Or fifth.  By the time Christmas gets here I’ll have carpal tunnel from all the list making.

Speaking of cards. Anyone else stalk the photo sites waiting on the best deal?  I have 3 photo books, 2 sets of cards (still haven’t decided which route to go-see previous bulleted rant), 2 prints and various other things waiting in a shopping cart.  Is the 20% off with free shipping better than last weeks 40% off one item and 1/2 off the lowest price ticket?  Is there a 50% off with free shipping coming next week?????  As you wait with your finger poised about the enter button you start second guessing yourself…’does anyone really even like these photo books?’ ‘why send cards, does anyone care?’ or ‘did a put a pic of this or that in the book? ‘.

Wrapping paper. Every year I plan for these elaborate packages.  What color theme do I want this year?  What will look good under the tree?  Traditional or funky? Whimsical or classy?  Tulle sashes or curled ribbon?  Really???  Who cares?  Seriously–it’s going to be ripped off anyway and NO ONE remembers what the package looked like!  They remember what is inside the package.  Duh.  (this year I went funky with fun, lime-ish green with a stark white design and white tulle ribbon (insert giggle) they are going to be so pretty).

Maybe this is why I have developed the nice habit of a warm cup of hot chocolate with a dollop of whipped cream a sprinkle of peppermint flakes and a dash of WHIPPED CREAM vodka every night.  Think I’ll do put on my la-tee-freakin’-da shirt and get back to all this holiday stuff.


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