Today’s outfit brought to you by…the Gap. Doubt you’ll ever see this ensemble in an ad…in fact if gap were to see this they would likely send us a cease and desist notification.
Tentatively she came into the bathroom and said, “so?” I turned to look and quickly turned back around. “So?” Was she really asking my opinion?
Like my mama says–don’t ask if you don’t want to know. She was asking-so I said,”I hate it.” She couldn’t be surprised by this statement. I was; however, surprised by her steam ten back to me, “I know-right-these shorts are tooooo loooong.” Somehow I refrained from retorting ‘the LENGTH of the shorts are the least of your problems. Since I couldn’t say that I simply said,”uhhhhh-ummmm.”
That was evidentially not enough. So much for sparing feelings by being non-committal and not verbalizing my disgust. She always was a child that needed a straight-up-definitive-black and white-answer. “I really hate it.”
She has the fall to look disappointed. It quickly dawned on me that it wasn’t my opinion that disappointed her but rather the thought that she wouldn’t be allowed to wear it. “Well…you are covered.” She brightened. “What’s UNDER the sweatshirt?” I suddenly thought to ask. Lord knows what dangers lurked beneath the mint green fleece. “A shirt,” she answered. Not having been born YESTERDAY I demanded to see said shirt. There were sleeves and enough fabric to cover her mid-riff. “Okay”. I meant okay to the shirt. She heard okay to the outfit and took off out of the bathroom.
“Really?” Her brother asked in disbelief. Lamely I answered, “She is covered.” He shook his head. “You gotta get a picture if that.”
I wish the fashion travesties ended there but they don’t. Mid afternoon my boss nods her head and indicates I should follow her to her office. There she starts laughing and reaches around as if to tuck in my tag. She starts laughing harder. Is it the size
that has her giggling? Nope. She holds up the hem to my shirt. I see threads-and seams-OMG-it’s inside out. I’ve been wandering around all day with my shirt INSIDE OUT!
My daughter make have looked stupid but at least she got her clothes on RIGHT!