A face only a mother could love

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This is a face only a mother could love. I am her mother and I love her but boy howdy I don’t like her too much right now.

See the hair all around her face? There are braids there somewhere. Turns out when you are fitch pitching and throwing your head from side to side it makes your hair come undone. Hmmmmm.

For the second game in a row the hellion refused to bat. For the 2nd game in a row I busted patootie to get out of work on time and hauled myself to the other side is town only to NOT see her play. You would think someone so shy and timid would be meek and gentle. Nope. She’s abnormally shy and abnormally stubborn and has a temper to boot. Not an attractive combination.

The refusing to bat was bad enough. It was embarrassing but not humiliating. Then came the parking lot. 50 chunky pounds of meanness decided still go limp on the concrete while screaming. I physically can’t lift her. I tug and pull and grapple and wrestle but she ain’t coming up. Her dad hauls her up but can’t do anything with her because the coach and her children are getting into the car on Sadie’s side. I don’t make eye contact. Hellion is still screaming and kicking and flailing away. We have to settle for tossing her into the back seat and shutting the door. For a moment there is blessed silence and she sticks her thumb in her mouth.

We tell her to get in her seat and the meltdown starts anew. She’s
Kicking and screaming and crying. Neighbors and teammates are all over the parking lot. It’s mortifying to be standing next to a car that’s shaking because a 4 year old doesn’t want to ride in your car-she wants her daddy’s car. The coach is opening 3 Capri suns and 3 cheeze-it bags so there is no attacking from that side. Do you know now long it takes to open 3 Capri suns????? An eternity.

At this point I murmur,”for gods sake” and crawl into the back to attempt to haul her into her booster seat. She goes limp. There is moving this hoss. We are in the back seat of a ford focus and she’s limp. Not a lot of room to maneuver. I manage a swat to her flank. It has little effect. There are now 2 adults manhandling this banshee into a toddle seat. And we are losing.

I move to avoid cleats kicking in my direction. “Stop this, stop this, stop this,” I am saying. Shockingly she doesn’t mind me. “You mean and I no like you,” she screams. “Guess what? I don’t like you too much right now either,” I want to say. I don’t. I am embarrassed enough without being seen engaging on verbal volleys with a 4 year old.

By grabbing one leg and angling just the right way I able to use geometric force to propel her in her seat. Despite being pinched so bad it hurt I got her clicked in.

There is no cute ending. No mommy moment to save the day. No lesson to learn from. I got nothing.

I love her but I really don’t like her an awful lot right now!

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