Ladies and gentleman start your engines

I made my first ride with my 15-year-old son today. I didn’t cry and I didn’t make him cry. We’ll just slide this experience into the win-win column.

I have a question. Where do boys learn to the I am so cool I can drive with my wrist move? Seriously. First legal drive ever (yep-there is a story there. Picture my aunt looking at me and saying incredulously -was that Colton that just drove by????) but I digress. It’s his first drive and he already had one hand casually thrown over the wheel like a college frat boy crusin the PCB strip during spring break. Uh 10 and 2 stud.

And that sideways, semi-propped slouch? Where does that come from? Too much The Fast and the Furious? Warning little Vin Diesel wanna be….you go fast and I’ll be furious. Sit up straight homeslice.

So there sat my boy-hat backwards, semi-slouched with his arm flung casually in a cranked car trying as hard as he could to not smile and give away how excited he was. He feels grown and I feel like he should still be laying on the ground making vroom, vroom noises as he races his matchbox cars round and round and round the den.

He was calm and cool and collected on the outside. I saw peeks of the little boy inside of him jumping up and down like a little boy on his first trip to Disney. He’s feeling the freedom of the road for oh, at least a quarter mile when a sleek, black, intimidating vehicle pulls out behind him. “He’s following too close! He’s following too close!” As cool as he wants to be his voice cracks a little and I have to laugh. I instruct him to pull into a neighborhood. The forbidding car streaks past. He starts breathing again and we take back to the road. In 500 feet another policeman can be seen. “Moooooommmm! Did you do this?!? Did you call them!” He asked in total
Seriousness as I was laughing. I assured him I didn’t. It was priceless. The PERFECT first drive story.

It won’t be long until we’ve got skrillex tunes (I don’t even know that was a genre-my 11 year old had to spell it for me) blaring and base thumping. I’ll yell “turn it down” and he will glance over from his semi-slouch with his wrist at 12 o’clock and cock that semi-grin at me while head dancing to music I can’t even understand. It’s coming-oh it’s coming.

For now though-10 and 2 and sit up like your momma taught you!

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