You are his mom…your job is to hug him and be proud of him and to keep him relaxed. And (this is the hard part) to trust the coach to coach.”
Wise-wise words that just happen to be exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks Jane!
I have control issues. Shocker-right? The issue: I like to be in control. The bigger issue: I don’t always know what the heck I am doing or what I am talking about. I don’t let that stand in my way too often 🙂 though.
My experience with diving can be summed up quite succinctly. A) my dad told me that good dives don’t make big splashes. B) I know a dive looks better if you point your toes and c) I hit the bottom of the pool one summer while diving. That’s it and that’s all. So as hard as it is for me to admit-I am not qualified to give my big guy advice or instruction about diving. Gulp. That was hard to admit. His coach, he colligate level, national award winning diver of a coach IS qualified to give instruction. Period. (That’s for you Ashley)
Well maybe it’s not a period. If I were better with grammar I would use the proper punctuation term here but we’ve already established that I am no grammar queen. I digress.
While I don’t know about diving I do know about fear. If asked I will
give my expert opinion on the fear he is facing. And yes-I am an expert on this subject. To prepare for just this conversation I did something this week that scared me. I asked for something I want that I think I deserve. If you know me you know the weight if that statement. I chose-quite intentionally-not to let fear stop me from trying. If my boy asks I can honestly tell him, based on experience, that if he stays afraid and doesn’t try then I can guarantee he won’t succeed. If he conquers his fear and at least tries I can guarantee he’s got a shot at succeeding.
I adore my babies. Sometimes I forget that I don’t have to have every answer and know everything to say and do in every moment and every situation to prove that to them. Thanks to my very wise friend today I realized that sometimes I just have to be their mom. Sometimes my job is to not have to right speech or the best advice. Sometimes to be the best mom means I have to hug them and be proud of them and let someone else teach and coach and advise. And…this is the hardest lesson…and sometimes I have to let them hit the board or scratch the dive to learn a lesson. I just realized something else. The lesson they learn might not be the one I want for them. Yikes. I am not quite ready to explore that revelation right now!
While I was typing this he did it. Not an inward. Not THE DIVE but close. Some deep thinking, encouragement from the coach (not his mom) and off he went. . It’s a start.